I’m Mega-Beating My Mega-Head On The Mega-Desk Here.
1) People need to learn to take a fucking joke. “M.E.G.A. On” is something that I made up, as the most literal, direct, and absurd translation of “R.O.C.K. On” there could be. It is in NO way official… yet. That I’ve seen, anyway.
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2) Castlevania turns 20, despite Sony’s best efforts to the contrary. Maybe that’s why “Sony’s gaming losses expected to continue,” but I don’t know for sure, because 1UP.com is moving slower than an old lady in a wheelchair going uphill.
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3) Konami has launched Konami RPG Stars, an online community dedicated fast-reflex action games like Contra and classic brawlers like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Oh, and Rumble Roses. Why not?
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4) Dreams DO come true, as the GBA Player’s Choice line expands. The Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past (which includes the Four Swords), Mario Kart Super Circuit, Pok?mon FireRed Version, Pok?mon LeafGreen Version, and Super Mario World: Super Mario Advance 2 join Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga, Yoshi’s Island: Super Mario Advance 3, Super Mario Advance, Metroid Fusion, Metroid Zero Mission, Megaman Battle Network, Pok?mon Ruby, Pok?mon Sapphire, Super Mario Advance 4: Super Mario Bros. 3.
… *screech*
Wait just a damn minute. *re-reads* When the hell did the Metroids, Pokemons, Super Mario 3, and MegaMan Battle Network join the lineup?! Bloody Hell.
Actually, this would be good. I still really want Super Mario Advance, and wanted Super Mario World to join the lineup. So I just need those, Mario Kart, and MegaMan Battle Network.
God, why couldn’t I have gotten that job?! *sobs*
Anyway, these run about 20 bucks per in the US, 25 in Canada.
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5) To those who ask “is there nothing sacred?” The answer is no. No there isn’t.
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6) HA! I KNEW DISNEY WOULDN’T LAST!
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7) Now this is queer. They make a movie DVD about Jak & Daxter‘s adventures for n00bs who don’t want to sit through the games, but it won’t be available at retail, and sounds like it can only be won?
So my question is, who’s likely to try for this besides people that are already Jak & Daxter fans? Seems like a waste.
Whatever, I prefer Ratchet & Clank, anyway.
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8) Thanks to the new adjustable difficulty levels, I may just have a new game to get for the ol’ PSP.
On a related note, I shed a tear for Maximo, whom I fear may never see a new game.
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9) It’s not due ’til October, which means the movie’s come and gone(wish I’d gotten to see it) and hopefully it won’t be rushed, but Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties for the DS is looking pretty good, better than I’d have expected given recent Garfield game efforts of late. The PS2 version(what? No Cube?) looks pretty good as well.
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10) Mario Hoops now has an American website.
I love the art for this game. It reminds me of the classic Mario art with some of the details of the newer renders…
Looks like Dixie Kong is returning, too.
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11) 10 tips for mobile magic. Next-Gen looks at how to improve mobile phone games.
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12) Ouch, PS3 launch costs are on the rise. That’s no good.
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13) Wii on October 1st? Probably not, but it’s funny speculation.
And if it turns out to be true, and this was intentional, then Nintendo is good. really good.
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14) Slashdot reports an About.com look at what Nintendo is bringing to the next-gen party. Oh, and uh, something about the other guys needing to catch up…
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15) Further parallels drawn between that old NP letter and the release of the Wii.
I’m almost tempted to agree with Joystiq’s latter prognosis of the similarities.
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16) Ninten-dos and Ninten-don’ts.
Incidently, from what I’ve heard of game movies, Nintendo had little to do with Mario’s movie, nor Capcom with Street Fighter, and that could be the problem right there.(I still gotta find a SMB DVD)
In fairness, no one’s bitching about the idea of DS-to-Wii or PSP-to-PS3 connectivity. Right idea, wrong time.
Elsewhere, FUCK YOU, I LOVE R.O.B.! He’s like a secondary mascot, and as noted here, got a lot of retailers to take in something they otherwise might not have, which could potentially have lead to us not even having a game industry today.
And finally, no comment.
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17) Wanna make games? Maybe Nintendo can help.
Talk about Christmas in July…
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18) Good news, everyone! EA doesn’t suck(as much) anymore!
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19) SEE, #16?! R.O.B. kicks YOUR ass, and sleeps with your mutha!!!
Um, yeah, boy. Bum-diggity. Or something.
…
…word?
(shame several of the links don’t work)
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20) More with the voice of Mario.
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21) PSP to TV? What a fucking waste of an idea. FAIL.
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22) An interesting bit questioning the validity of Mario’s profession as a plumber.
But, it’s a bit faulty. The booklet for Super Mario Bros., which I just happen to have right here(don’t ask, please), says absolutely nothing about Mario being a plumber. Hell, it was years before I actually knew.
In fact, it doesn’t even say where he comes from.
I realize it’s probably supposed to be tongue in cheek, but it helps more when your facts are straight.
Incidently, as tools go, he does have those hammers, and he and Luigi even use them for a plumbing job in Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga.
I love the comment in the blog, however:
“I once had a plumber turn up that was dressed as super mario – he had the van done up and everything. Idiot.”
“Not that it’s convincing evidence, but in the original Mario Bros., Mario actually did some plumbing. Of course he was dealing with just the pests that came out of the plumbing, and he did in fact just deal with said pest by jumping, but those pipes were clean, gosh darnit!”
I go with what SMBHQ(I think) was quoted as saying in EGM’s special, that Mario is a “general contractor.” Carpenter, plumber, doctor, cookie baker, adventurer…
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23) G4 shows Kotaku showing DS Lite problems. Kotaku shows that they don’t really appreciate it any more or less than anyone else did.
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24) Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you what was clearly anticipated a long time ago, for this must be THE reason for the creation of the term “WTF?”
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LBD “Nytetrayn”